Let’s Make America Rational Again

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A rational America? Hah, that would be a big change! Not sure it’s going to happen. But truthfully, playtime’s over.

We’ve all been awash in our emotions, splashing around in a gigantic pool of delusions and sooner or later we’ve got to get out of the water, dry ourselves off, and tell our emotions to go fuck themselves. Because they’ve been doing us no favors for a long time. We haven’t been enjoying them and they haven’t been enjoying us. It’s all been a big drag for at least 8 years and probably longer than that.

So grab your towel, pull up a chair, and let’s figure out how to be less emotional and more normal.

Step 1: Pretend that you are so rational that you don’t give a fuck.

Clearly, this is going to be difficult, but if it wasn’t difficult it probably wouldn’t be worth doing. The idea here is to imagine that you are not emotionally invested in the fate of your nation.

That doesn’t sound like a good idea when, regardless of who or what you did or didn’t vote for recently, all forms of media talking about current events have been telling you that the fate of your nation is absolutely, stupendously awful. If you’re on the right side of the political spectrum, your sources of info have been telling you that your nation is a swirling cesspool of dangerous awfulness due to the existence of transgender people and Democrats.

If you’re on the left side of the political spectrum, your sources of info have been telling you that your nation is a swirling cesspool of dangerous awfulness due to the existence of Republicans and Donald Trump. If you’re studiously trying to avoid being on the political spectrum at all, your sources of info have been telling you that your nation is a swirling cesspool of awfulness due to things like a ‘pandemic’, ‘inflation’, ‘migrants’ and ‘ultra-processed foods.’ Or whatever.

Your sources of info have been telling you things designed to make you feel that you are emotionally invested in the state of your nation and not bored by the staggering complexity and bureaucratic mundanity of the nuts and bolts problems of state.

Your sources of info are wrong. They’ve been lying to you and manipulating you for a good long time and they have burned you out emotionally possibly beyond the point of repair.

But repair yourself you must. So even though pretending to not give a flying fuck seems like the wrong thing to do at a time of cataclysmic danger to your nation from nasty illegal immigrants who are plotting to eat J.D. Vance because he looks like a hairy animal or from an avowed tyrannical tyrant taking over the government of your homeland – you’ve got to do it.

You’ve got to detach.

You can read Heather Cox Richardson’s Letters from an American for historical perspective. You can also listen to really really old people who lived through World War I or something. Or take up meditation. Or something.

Something to give yourself perspective. The perspective is not going to save your butt from anything; it’s just going to help you manage your emotions so that they don’t come sneaking up to ambush you.

Which quite frankly, is what your emotions have been doing for some time now. And by your emotions, I mean my emotions too. We’ve all been awash in zeitgeist-induced emotionality that has made us all feel and act like shit. It’s not been good for us.

So we’ve got to detach, calm down, and yes, get more rational – so that we can make better decisions in the future and save ourselves from certain doom or whatever it is we are actually facing. I personally plan to follow this advice faithfully just as soon as I finish not following it at all.

If this doesn’t immediately work, try Step 2, which is moving hastily to Switzerland.

Just kidding. Switzerland is lovely and I know someone who moved there recently and loves it, so I am envious. But that’s not Step 2. Step 2 is:

Step 2: Acknowledge and name your emotions but don’t act on them. Yet.

You’re angry. Or you’re scared. Or you’re scared and angry. Perhaps you’re numb. You could be strangely nonchalant. Wouldn’t be surprising if you’re butthurt. Or you’re in disbelief. Or you’re disgusted. Whatever.

Learn different words for emotions and use them to say things to yourself like “I am gloating right now, gloating.” Or celebrating. Or brokenhearted. Or bored and tired. Or resigned. Whatever.

We’ve all done too much naming of other people for quite a while and not nearly enough naming of our own feelings. It’s been pernicious. And weird. And definitely not rational. Or strategic.

“You are a racist, misogynistic piece of turd” might seem like an entirely factual description of Samuel J. Alito or someone else in the news but it is actually just a cover-up statement of your own emotions. Which are more like “I feel threatened and disheartened. I feel worried about my daughters and therefore I am anxious and enraged.” Etc.

Labeling each other has prevented us from doing stuff for ourselves. Because the underlying premise of labeling someone else is that it is incumbent on that other person to change. Which they ain’t gonna do. Because your emotions are your problem not theirs.

The key to getting what you want is knowing what you want. And boy have we not been articulating what we want. Because apparently all we want is for everyone else who is not like us to change. So the people who do know what they want (billionaires) have been getting it (more power and money), and the rest of us have been busy accidentally fucking ourselves over.

Which is not good because the billionaires and politicians have been doing that too so…. yeah, not good.

Label your emotions, analyze them, decide what you want, and what you can do to get it.

Sounds incredibly daunting, doesn’t it? But that’s just cuz we’re all out of practice. It used to be the norm, believe it or not.

Step 3: To get rational – look at the facts objectively.

Before making an informed and rational decision to go running around the room in circles, screaming.

That would be a temporary stop-gap measure though.

The idea, again, is to look at the facts of the situation, whatever the situation might be, as if you didn’t have strong feelings about it. That’s not to say you won’t have strong feelings about things. Strong feelings will always be a part of life. Rationality is about putting strong feelings to the side for a moment.

It’s about forcing your mind open just enough to allow the information to come in. Not the speculation, the vibe, the zeitgeist, the emotional contagion, the rumors, etc. The facts. Looking objectively at them.

And then using things like logic and reason to come to a decision. Logic and reason informed by values.

Let’s say, for example, that the number one thing in life you value is Tootsie Roll pops. Your regard for Tootsie Roll pops is so high that if it was necessary to resort to war to secure Tootsie Roll pops, then you would go to war. Because you value Tootsie Roll pops that much. Logically, then, based on your values, you would put a high priority on securing an adequate supply of Tootsie Roll pops.

But if you valued something else, such as the business you own, or a cause like a college education for second generation immigrant women, then the rational thing to do would be to base your decisions on the importance of these priorities.

And then comes the hard part – which is being reasonable.

Looking at other sides of the issue. What is reasonable to do, what takes into account other perspectives, while honoring your values.

Yes, you want Tootsie Roll pops. Enough to risk war to get them. But is there another way to pursue your passion for Tootsie Roll pops that takes into account other people’s reasonable aversion to a Tootsie Roll pop war? If you look at the issue from other perspectives, is it possible that a temporary supply chain issue with Tootsie Roll pops can be solved with some patience and better logistics? As well as you taking advantage of the eventual resolution of the supply chain problems by hoarding enough Tootsie Roll pops to prevent yourself from ever being in the Tootsie Roll pop deficit situation again?

That’s what being rational is all about.

People used to take that approach to solving world issues all the fucking time.

No, seriously, it was the default mode of liberal democracy for like 270 years or something like that. Maybe not that long but you know, a long time. It didn’t always work but it was the ideal.

It’s time, if it’s not already too late, to make that the ideal again. The default. The mode du jour.

Being rational. As opposed to delusional fucking ourselves over big time.

Let’s make America rational again.

(And get pretty fed up with all that isn’t rational.)